Category Housekeeping Jokes
| Rating: 3 from 5 (One vote) |
| |
| Random joke My friend`s husband is always telling her that housekeeping would be a snap if only she would organize her time better. Recently he had a chance to put his theory into practice while his wife was away.When I popped in one evening to see how he was managing, he crowed, "I made a cake, frosted it, washed the kitchen windows, cleaned all the cupboards, scrubbed the kitchen floor, walls and ceiling and even had a bath."I was about to concede that perhaps he was a better manager than his wife, when he added sheepishly, "When I was making the chocolate frosting, I forgot to turn off the mixer before taking the beaters out of the bowl, so I had to do all the rest."
| |
|
Funny pictures
Category Lawyer Jokes
| Rating: 4 from 5 (One vote) |
| |
| Random joke One day, there was this lawyer who had just
bought a new car, and he was eager to show it off to his colleagues,
when all of a sudden an eighteen wheeler came out of nowhere and
took of the driver's side door with him standing right there. "NOOO!"
he screamed, because he knew that no matter how good a mechanic
tried to fix it, it never would be the same. Finally, a cop came by,
and the lawyer ran up to him yelling. "MY JAGUAR DOOR WAS JUST
RUINED BY SOME FOOLISH DRIVER!!!" he exclaimed. "Your a
lawyer aren't you?" asked the policeman. "Yes, I am, but
what does this have to do with my car?!?!" the lawyer asked.
"HA! Your lawyers are always so materialistic. All you care
about is your possessions. I bet you didn't even notice that your
left arm is missing
| |
|
Funny pictures
Category Farting Jokes
| Rating: 3 from 5 (2 votes) |
| |
| Random joke The Scientific Person: One who farts frequently, but is truly concerned for the environment.
| |
|
Funny pictures
Category Steven Wright Jokes
| Rating: 1 from 5 (2 votes) |
| |
| Random joke
I own the erasers for all the miniature golf pencils.
|
Funny pictures
Category Blonde Jokes
| Rating: 5 from 5 (2 votes) |
| |
| Random joke There was a blonde and a brunette in an
elevator. On their way down, they stop to pick up another person
also on their way down. When the person got on, the girls noticed
that he was pretty cute. Unfortunately he had dandruff. Finally, on
the way off of the elevator the two girls let the guy go ahead of
them. The brunette turns to the blonde and says "Oh my god! We
need to give him Head and Shoulders." The blonde then replies
"That's a pretty good idea, but how are we going to give him
shoulders?"
|
Category Drummer Jokes
| It still doesn't have a vote, be the first one that votes it! |
| |
| Random joke How do you get a drummer to play an accelerando?Ask him to play in 4/4 at a steady 120 bpm.
|
Category Antartian Jokes
| Rating: 2 from 5 (One vote) |
| |
| Random joke Q: What is it when an Antartian blows into another Antartian's ear?
A: Data transfer.
Q: What did the Antartian say when she found out she was pregnant?
A: "I wonder if it's mine?"
Q: Why shouldn't Antartian's have coffee breaks?
A: It takes too long to retrain them.
Q: What do you call an eternity?
A: Four Antartians at a four-way stop.
Q: How do you confuse an Antartian?
A: Give him a package of M&M's and tell him to put them in alphabetical order.
|
Category College Jokes
| Rating: 3 from 5 (4 votes) |
| |
| Random joke Q. Why do University of Michigan graduates hang their diplomas from their rear view mirror?
A. So they can use handicapped parking.
|
Category Redneck Jokes
| Rating: 4 from 5 (One vote) |
| |
| Random joke You dated your daddy's current wife in high
school.
|
Category Baby Jokes
| Rating: 3.5 from 5 (14 votes) |
| |
| Random joke A married couple rushed to the hospital because the woman was in labor the doctor asked the couple, "I have invented a new machine that you might want to try, it takes some of the labor pains away from the mother and gives it to the father." So the married couple decided that they would try this. So the doctor hooked the machine up and put it on 10% of pain switched from the mother to the father and the husband said "I feel okay turn it up a lot more" so the doctor turned it up to 50% and the husband said "why don`t you just put it all on me cause I`m not feeling a thing" but the doctor warned them "this much could kill you if your not prepared", and the husband replied "I am ready "so the doctor turned the machine up to 100% but the husband didn`t fell a thing so they went home happy with a pain free labor, but when they got home the mailman was dead on the front porch!
|
Category Deep Thoughts Jokes
| Rating: 5 from 5 (One vote) |
| |
| Random joke
Why isn`t the number 11 pronounced onety one?
|
|