| It still doesn't have a vote, be the first one that votes it! |
| |
|
11 A man walks into a Silicon Valley pet store looking to buy a monkey. The store owner points towards three identical looking monkeys in politically-correct, animal-friendly natural mini-habitats.
"The one on the left costs $500," says the store owner.
"Why so much?" asks the customer.
"Because it can program in C," answers the store owner.
The customer inquires about the next monkey and is told, "That one costs $1500, because it knows Visual C++ and Object-Relational technology."
The startled man then asks about the third monkey. "That one costs $3000," answers the store owner.
"3000 dollars!!" exclaims the man. "What can that one do?"
To which the owner replies, "To be honest, I've never seen it do a single thing, but it calls itself a Consultant."
|
|
|
| It still doesn't have a vote, be the first one that votes it! |
| |
|
12 Computers can never replace humans. They may become capable of artificial intelligence, but they will never master real stupidity.
|
| It still doesn't have a vote, be the first one that votes it! |
| |
|
13 You Know you are Addicted to the Internet When...
· You step out of your room and realize that your parents have moved, and you don't have a clue when it happened.
· Your wife drapes a blond wig over your monitor to remind you of what she looks like.
· All of your friends have an @ in their names.
· Your dog has its own home page.
· You can't call your mother... she doesn't have a modem.
· You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop and check your e-mail on the way back to bed.
· You buy a Captain Kirk chair with a built-in keyboard and mouse.
· You get a new suit that says, "This best viewed with Netscape 4.01 or higher."
· The last girl you asked out was only a jpeg.
· Your wife says communication is important in a marriage... so
|
|
|
| It still doesn't have a vote, be the first one that votes it! |
| |
|
14 New customer to Tech Support: “It says, hit any key and when I do that nothing happens'.
Tech Support: Can you try again and tell me what happens?
Customer: 'Tried but nothingâ€Â
Tech Support: “What key did you hit?
After a moment and some chick ling sound the customer replied: Well, first I tried my car key and just now my office key.
|
| It still doesn't have a vote, be the first one that votes it! |
| |
|
15 True story from a Novell NetWire SysOp:
Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"
Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"
Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty period.
How do I go about getting that fixed?"
Tech: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"
Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."
Tech: "Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped. It's because I am.
Did you receive this as part of a promotional, at a trade show? How did you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?"
Caller: "It came with my computer, I don't know anything about a promotional.
It just has '4X' on it. “At this point the Tech Rep had to mute the caller, because
he couldn't stand it. The caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM
drive as a cup h
|
|
|
jokes-db.com
