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31 The owner of a small computer store was getting tired of fixing the exact same problem over and over on computers for people...one day 3 customers came in at the same time. He looked at them all and said. Everyone one of your computers gave me this error message "Error you have a syntax IDtenT error.and asked them to right it down. All of them got out their pens and wrote IDtenT error, he smiled then told them. No that's not how you write it is the number "10". So they all wrote it again...ID10T error
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32 If Microsoft operated Restaurants Patron: Waiter!
Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill, and I'll be your Support
Waiter. What seems to be the problem?
Patron: There's a fly in my soup!
Waiter: Try again, maybe the fly won't be there this time.
Waiter: Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl; what kind of bowl are you using?
Patron: A SOUP bowl!
Waiter: Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the fly in your soup?
Patron: I sat down and ordered the Soup of the Day!
Waiter: Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the Day?
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33 A man calls technical support for his computer.
(M = Man)
(T = Technical support)
M: Ok, the screen is blue and it says windows has been shut down because an error has been detected.
T: All right, press ctrl alt delete.
M: Now what?
T: Does it say press any key to continue?
M: Yeah, why?
T: Well, lets see, hmm.....PRESS IT!!!!
M: Wait let me find it first.
T: Just Press Any Key!!!
M: I'M TRYING TO FIND IT...!
T: When it says any key it means to press ANY key...
M: Oh wait. I found it he he...
T: What does it say now?
M: Sorry the 'Any' key you have pressed does not exist, please click any key.
T: Well, what are you waiting for?
M: I'm still looking for it.
T: I though you found it?
M: Yeah I did but the 'any' it was spelt 'enee' now its spelt 'any'
T: ..."
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34 Mr. R.B. Jones applied for a position with the government and was accepted. On his first day the personnel dept processed his records. When asked what the R.B. stood for he informed the clerk that they stood for nothing. His parents had named him with the initials only.
The clerk informed him that his records could not show initials only so they typed his name as R. (only) B. (only) Jones. He got his first paycheck made out to Ronly Bonly Jones!
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35 If Operating Systems were beer..
DOS Beer:
Requires you to use your own can opener, and requires you to read the directions carefully before opening the can. Originally only came in an 8-oz. can, but now comes in a 16-oz. can. However, the can is divided into 8 compartments of 2 oz. each, which have to be accessed separately.
Soon to be discontinued, although a lot of people are going to keep drinking it after it's no longer available.
Mac Beer:
At first, came only a 16-oz. can, but now comes in a 32-oz. can. Considered by many to be a "light" beer. All the cans look identical. When you take one from the fridge, it opens itself. The ingredients list is not on the can. If you call to ask about the ingredients, you are told that "you don't need to know." A notice on the side reminds you to drag your empties to the trashcan.
Windows 95 Beer:
You can't buy it yet,
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