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1 During last night`s debate, John Kerry and John Edwards were so friendly to each other some political experts think that they may end up running together. In fact Kerry and Edwards were so friendly, President Bush accused them of planning a gay marriage. —Conan O`Brien
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2 Ralph Nader announced he`s running for president after a new poll found he`d get .5% of the vote. Nader`s slogan: `Eat my dust Kucinich.` —Craig Kilborn
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3 A big weekend for the candidates. President Bush highlighted his foreign policy, and then John Kerry emphasized his war record, and then Ralph Nader bragged about an article he wrote on toasters that explode. —Craig Kilborn
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4 As of midnight Thursday night, John Kerry began receiving Secret Service protection, a three-car detail of special agents, and a bullet proof limousine pulled up in front of his house and stayed there all night. See, that`s what you get when you`re the frontrunner. Dennis Kucinich got a whistle and a can of mace. —Jay Leno
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5 John Edwards is a seasoned trial lawyer. You think a lawyer would make a good president? You know I look at it this way, if we`re going to consistently have liars in the White House, why not get a professional? —Jay Leno
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