| It still doesn't have a vote, be the first one that votes it! |
| |
| 36 The visit to the dentist
One day, Betty goes to her dentist and
asks him how much it will cost to extract a wisdom tooth.
"Eighty pounds," the dentist says.
"That`s a ridiculous amount," Betty says.
"Isn`t there a cheaper way?"
"Well," the dentist says, "if I don`t
use an anaesthetic, I can knock it down to £60."
"That`s still too expensive," Betty says.
"Okay," says the dentist. "If I save on
anaesthesia and simply rip the teeth out with a pair of pliers, I could
get away with charging you only £20."
"No," moans Betty, "it`s still too much."
"Hmm," says the dentist, scratching his
head. "If I let one of my students do it without anaesthetic and use a
pair of old pliers - just for the experience, you understand, I suppose
I could charge you just £10."
"Marvellous," says the woman, "book my
husband Moishe for next Tuesday!"
| |
|
| It still doesn't have a vote, be the first one that votes it! |
| |
| 37 The genie
Sadie is walking along the beach one day
finds a bottle.
She rubs it and, sure enough, out popped
a genie.
"I will grant you three wishes," said
the genie. "But there is a catch."
"What catch?" Sadie asked.
The genie replied, "Every time you make
a wish, your husband Maurice will receive double the wish you were granted."
"Well, I can live with that! No problem!"
replied the elated Sadie.
"What is your first wish?" asked the genie.
"Well, I`ve always wanted a Mercedes Benz!"
POOF! A Mercedes Benz appeared in front of the woman. "Don’t forget, now
your husband Maurice has TWO Mercedes Benz," said the genie.
"Well, that`s okay, as long as I`ve got
my Mercedes," replied the woman.
"Next wish?" "I`d love a million pounds,"
replied the woman.
POOF! One million pounds appeared at her
feet.
"Don’t forget, now your husband Maurice
has TWO million pounds," said the genie.
"Well, that`s okay, as long as I`ve got
my million," replied the woman.
"What is your third and final wish?"
The woman thought long and hard, and finally
said, "Well, you know, I`ve always wanted to donate one of my kidneys!"
| | Rating: 5 from 5 (One vote) |
| |
| 38 The loan
Issy walks into a central London bank
and says he`s going to America for two weeks and needs to borrow £5,000.
For collateral, he offers his new Rolls
Royce. The bank is satisfied and parks it in their secured underground
garage.
Two weeks later to the day, Issy returns
to the bank and repays the £5,000 plus interest of £9.41
The loan officer says inquiringly, "Sir,
we were delighted to have your business but checking your credit, we learned
you are a multimillionaire. Why ever did you need to borrow £5,000?"
"Where else in central London could I
park my car for two weeks for £9.41
| |
|
| Rating: 5 from 5 (One vote) |
| |
| 39 The hearing test
Maurice and Sarah were getting old and
Maurice felt his wife was losing her hearing.
He decided to stage a test. One day, as
Sarah read the paper, he stood a distance behind her chair and said, in
a conversational voice, "Can you hear me?" Silence.
He moved towards her. He was now 6 feet
away. "Can you hear me?" Still silence.
Finally, he moved directly behind her
chair and bent over, just inches from her ear "Can you hear me?"
Sarah replied "For the third time, Maurice,
Yes I can!"
| | Rating: 5 from 5 (One vote) |
| |
| 40 More riddles
Q: What did God say after he created man?
A: "I can do better than this."
Q: Who, in history, had the very first
motorcycle?
A: Moses - the roar of his triumph could
be heard all over Israel.
| |
|
|
jokes-db.com
