| Rating: 3.5 from 5 (2 votes) |
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| 6 During a simulated attack, the troops have to defend themselves against an imaginary enemy, as the sergeant calls it. Bawling out orders, he notices that one recruit shows little response. “You there,†the sergeant shouts, “the imaginary enemy is advancing, and your are caught in the crossfire. Action!†The recruit takes two steps to one side.
“What are you doing, man?†Yells the sergeant, purple with fury. “I’m taking shelter behind an imaginary tree, Sergeant,†answers the recruit calmly.
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| 7 A young ensign had nearly completed his first overseas tour of sea duty when he was given an opportunity to display his ability at getting the ship under way. With a stream of crisp commands, he had the decks buzzing with men. The ship steamed out of the channel and soon the port was far behind.
The ensign's efficiency has been remarkable. In fact, the deck was abuzz with talk that he had set a new record for getting a destroyer under way. The ensign glowed at his accomplishment and was not all surprised when another seaman approached him with a message from the captain.
He was, however, a bit surprised to find that it was a radio message, and he was even more surprised when he read, "My personal congratulations upon completing your underway preparation exercise according to the book and with amazing speed. In your haste, however, you have overlooked one of the unwritten rules -- Make Sure The Captain Is Aboard Before Getting Under Way." 
| | Rating: 5 from 5 (One vote) |
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| 8 A famous scientist developed a formula to bring statues to life.
He went to a local park to try it out on a statue of Gen. Ulysses Grant.
After application, Gen Grant began to move and soon was completely alive.
The scientist asked, "What's the first thing you'll do, General?"
The general answered while drawing his pistol "I'm going to kill about a million damn pigeons!"
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| Rating: 5 from 5 (One vote) |
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| 9 The drill sergeant making his morning announcements to a group of newcomers in a training camp, stated: "Today, gentlemen, I have some good news and some bad news. First, the good news Private Peters will be setting the pace on our morning run.â€
With this the platoon was overjoyed, as Private Peters was overweight and terribly slow. But then the drill sergeant finished his statement: "Now for the bad news. Private Peters will be driving a truck."
| | Rating: 3.5 from 5 (2 votes) |
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| 10 During training exercises, the Lieutenant driving down a
muddy back road encountered another car stuck in the mud
with a red-faced colonel at the wheel.
"Your jeep stuck, sir?" asked the Lieutenant as he pulled
alongside.
"Nope," replied the Colonel, coming over and handing him
the keys, "Yours is."
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