Bible Jokes Category

Mother of JesusA ten year old, under the tutelage of her grandmother, was becoming quite knowledgeable about the Bible.Then one day she floored her grandmother by asking, `Which Virgin was the mother of Jesus: the Virgin Mary or the King James Virgin? Read more

First ManA Sunday School teacher asked little Willie who the first man in the Bible was."Hoss." said Willie."Wrong," said the teacher. "It was Adam.""Aw, shucks!" Willie replied. "I knew it was one of those Cartwrights." Read more

The Story of LotA father was reading Bible stories to his young son.He read, "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but his wife looked back and was turned into a pillar of salt."The son asked, "What happened to the flea?" Read more

A more modern version of the binding of IsaacAnd it came to pass after these things that G-d did test Avraham. And He said to him "Avraham!"And Avraham replied "Hineni - here I am."And He said, "Take your computer, your old computer, your 286, and install upon it an operating system, a new operating system, Windows 95, which I will show to you."And Avraham rose up early in the morning, and saddled his ass. He loaded his computer, his old computer, his 286, on the ass. And he took two of his young men with him and Yitzchak his son. And he rose up and went to the place where G-d had told him, there to find Windows 95.Then, on the third day, Avraham lifted his eyes and saw Windows 95 from afar. And Avraham said to his young men, "Stay here with the ass; and I and the lad will go yonder and load Windows 95 on our 286, and come again to you."And Avraham took his computer his old computer, his 286, and laid it on Yitzchak his son. And they went both of them together.And Yitzchak spoke to Avraham his father and said, "My father." And he replied, "Hineni - Here I am, my son." And Yitzchak said, "Windows 95 requires far more memory than a 286 has. How will it possibly run on your machine?"And Avraham looked at his son, his only son, whom he loved; and he shook his head slowly, and in perfect faith and with unswerving trust and belief in the Almighty, he said:"Fear not, Yitzchak my son, . . . . G-d will provide the RAM." Read more