Bus Jokes Category

When you take the bus... Eat nothing but gas inducing foods the entire trip, not hesitating to share the wealth with everyone on board.

Recommended foods are chilli, burritos, McDonalds, any eggs, Kentuky Fried Chicken (stay near the toilet if you want the KFC...)

When you take the bus...

Repeat #1, only engage in a duppy war with the bus driver. (For those that do not know what a duppy is, it involves making a cup with your hand, farting in it and slipping it directly into the face of some unsuspecting friend.)

When you take the bus...

Every time the bus wobbles from the wind caused by passing transports, jump up and scream we`are ALL GONNA DIE!?

When you take the bus...

Incessantly complain that it is way too cold in the bus, no matter what the temperature is, keep doing it until the bus driver turns the heat up to full blast just to shut you up, then wait a few minutes for it to get really hot and start to complain about it.

Two words: Water Pistol Two more words: Paper Airplanes

When you take the bus...

Make racing car noises constantly, occasionally announcing your progress along the acetrack in an announcer voice.

When anyone comes up to you and asks what the fuck you are doing, look at them funny and ask how they got in your NASCAR.

When you take the bus...

Eat nothing but really noisy foods, such as bags of chips, nachos, tacos, individually wrapped candies and unwrap them as loudly as possible.

Also eat them noisily, chewing with your mouth open and making the loudest possible slopping noises.

When you take the bus...

Sit at the back of the bus, turning off all the lights around you and keeping the blinds down, keep a black briefcase on your lap at all times, wear a black trench coat and a black hat, look really nervous, don't talk to anybody and keep glancing at your watch.

When you take the bus...

Walk up and down the aisle, claiming out loud that you are Jesus and blessing everyone with a half-eaten leg of Kentucky Fired Chicken.