Children Jokes Category

I recently took my 5 kids to the Naval Air Museum in Pensacola Florida (a great museum and free admission). They have one room that is full of real cockpits for the kids to sit in. I lifted my 4 yr old daughter into one cockpit that had side by side seating for the pilot and co-pilot. When my daughter got in she said "Good - this one`s two player!" Read more

Housewife: "How did you know I was home? My son told you I was out"Salesman: "It was easy Lady. He was mowing the lawn." Read more

When Ruth`s grandson Jordan was 5, he always told everyone he wanted to be a doctor when he grew up. One day he was running through the house and into the corner of a chair and hurt his eye. He cried for a while and kept saying, "Oh no, oh no, now I can`t be a doctor when I grow up."Ruth assured him he could still be a doctor and Jordan kept telling her he couldn`t.Finally she asked, "Why can`t you be a doctor?"Holding one hand over his eye, Jordan said, "Because now I will have to be a pirate!" Read more

Because I couldn`t unplug the toilet with a plunger, I had to dismantle the entire fixture, no small feat for a non-plumber. Jammed inside the drain was a purple rubber dinosaur, which belonged to my five-year-old son. I painstakingly got all the toilet parts together again, the tank filled, and I flushed it.However, it didn`t work much better than before! As I pondered what to do next, my son walked into the bathroom. I pointed to the purple dinosaur I had just dislodged and told him that the toilet still wasn`t working. "Did you get the green one, too?" he asked. Read more

Kids these days, they grow up too quickly and know entirely too much too soon. I mean this one friend of mine was trying to get his boy into Nursery Rhymes.All that happened was that the boy told his shrink that his Father had a lot of problems, including a fixation that a cow could orbit the moon. Read more