Money Jokes Category

This guy is walking with his friend, who happens to be a psychologist. He says to this friend, "I`m a walking economy."The friend asks, "How so?""My hair line is in recession, my stomach is a victim of inflation, and both of these together are putting me into a deep depression!" Read more

When the U.S. Mint reissued two-dollar bills, I thought they might someday become collectors` items. I went to the bank and picked up a hundred, serially numbered and still in their original band.On my next trip to my parents` house, I gave the $200 to my mother and said, "Take good care of these. They might be worth something someday."Several months later I asked Mom if she was keeping the two-dollar bills safe. "Oh, yes!" she replied. "I deposited them in the bank the day after you left." Read more

A man goes into a bar and seats himself on a stool. The bartender looks at him and says, "What`ll it be buddy?"The man says, "Set me up with seven whiskey shots and make them doubles." The bartender does this and watches the man slug one down, then the next, then the next, and so on until all seven are gone almost as quickly as they were served. Staring in disbelief, the bartender asks why he`s doing all this drinking."You`d drink them this fast too if you had what I have."The bartender hastily asks, "What do you have pal?"The man quickly replies, "I have a dollar." Read more

Lars asked Ole, "Do ya know da difference between a Norvegian and a canoe?""No, I don`t," said Ole."A canoe will sometimes tip," explained Lars. Read more

A motorist, driving by a Texas ranch, hit and killed a calf that was crossing the road. The driver went to the owner of the calf and explained what had happened. He then asked what the animal was worth."Oh, about $200 today," said the rancher. "But in six years it would have been worth $900. So $900 is what I`m out."The motorist sat down and wrote out a check and handed it to the farmer."Here," he said, "is the check for $900. It`s postdated six years from now." Read more