Police Jokes Category

A man traveling over 125 miles per hour on the interstate was stopped by a highway patrol. "Sorry, officer, said the driver, "was I driving too fast?
"No, sir. Our were flying too low.
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A man steals paintings from a museum and gets a few blocks away, runs out of gas and the cops catch him. When asked what happened he replied..."I didn`t have enough Monet to pay for Degas to make the Van Gogh!!!! Read more

The police officer: "You were exceeding the speed limit, ma`am, weren`t you?
The driver: "Yes, I was, sir, but you see my brakes are so bad that I wanted to get home before I had an accident.
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A rookie was calling up his station on his pocket radio.
"I`m outside the Plaza Mall, he reported. "A man has been robbed
I`ve got one them.
"Which one? asked the operator.
"The one that was robbed.
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A traffic cop pulled over a speeding motorist and asked, "Do you have any ID?
The motorist replied, "About what?

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We've all been lost and depended on our wives to act as navigator.
Well, not long ago, Mrs. Jim Jr., her face buried in a map book, said "Turn here!" I did, and didn't notice the "No Left Turn" sign. Just my luck, a policeman was nearby and stopped me. I tried to explain that we were lost and I was following my wife's directions.
He issued me a ticket for "Driving Under the Influence of Wife." Read more

A traffic cop pulled over a speeding motorist and asked, "Do you have any ID?"
The motorist replied, "About what?" Read more

Three guys witness a murder; the only problem is they each say only one thing. The first guy says, "Mememememe." The second guy says, "Forks and knifes." And the third guy says, "Goody, goody gumdrops."
When the policeman gets there, he asks, "Who killed this man?" The first guy replies, "Memememememe." Then the policeman asks, "What did you kill him with?" The second guy replies, "Forks and knifes. Forks and knifes." Then the policeman says, "That's it! You're all going to jail." The third guy says, "Goody, goody gumdrops!" Read more

Police quote: `In God we trust, the rest are suspects.` Read more