Rodney Dangerfield Jokes Category

I`m not a sexy guy. I went to a hooker. I dropped my pants. She dropped her price. Read more

With my wife I don`t get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to `the best woman a man ever had.` The waiter joined me. Read more

I tell you, I`m not a sexy guy. I was the centerfold for Playgirl magazine. The staples covered everything! Read more

What a childhood I had, why, when I took my first step, my old man tripped me! Read more

Last week I told my psychiatrist, "I keep thinking about suicide." He told me from now on I have to pay in advance. Read more

I tell ya when I was a kid, all I knew was rejection. My yo-yo, it never came back! Read more

Oh, when I was a kid in show business I was poor. I used to go to orgies to eat the grapes. Read more

When I was a kid I got no respect. The time I was kidnapped, and the kidnappers sent my parents a note they said, "We want five thousand dollars or you`ll see your kid again." Read more

I tell ya, my wife was never nice. On our first date, I asked her if I could give her a goodnight kiss on the cheek - she bent over! Read more

I tell you, with my doctor, I don`t get no respect. I told him, "I`ve swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills." He told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. Read more