School Jokes Category

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching." Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples." Read more

What school supply is always tired? A knapsack! Read more

What’s the difference between a teacher and a steam train? The first goes “Spit out that chewing gum immediately!” and the second goes “chew chew”! Read more

What is white when its dirty and black when its clean? A blackboard! Read more

The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading. After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees and minutes the teacher asked, "Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude...?" After a confused silence, a voice volunteered, "I guess you`d be eating alone." Read more

Teacher: Could you please pay a little attention? Student: I`m paying as little attention as I can. Read more

A man in a hurry taking his eight-year-old son to school made a turn at a red light where it was prohibited. "Uh-oh, I think I just made an illegal turn!" the man said. "It`s okay, Dad," the boy said, "The police car right behind us did the same thing." Read more

Q: What object is king of the classroom? A: The ruler! Read more

Teacher: Name two days of the week that start with "t". Pupil: Today and Tomorrow. Read more

Q: Why did the teacher wear sunglasses? A: Because his class was so bright! Read more